Why rejection can be a good thing

In December I got my most recent rejection letter, which hurt like hell.  But it was a really nice rejection letter, and once I licked my wounds I could, and will, pick myself up.  It just means that I am trying to pursue my dream. 

A few months back a writer friend posted a blog on rejection (check it out here and check out her published story in Rocky Romance here), I shared it on my author FB page and got a comment “Fear of rejection keeps me from submitting anything, ever.” 

That got me to thinking.  We’re all afraid of rejection.  From asking out the person we fancy, to trying out for some team or school play, via everything else our hearts desire. 

But sometimes, sometimes rejection is a good thing. 

It makes us more determined: 

“Failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me.” --- J.K. Rowling (taken from Harvard Magazine)

It can steer us in the right direction: 

It can teach us something (remember that ex you thought you’d NEVER get over?)

The point is, if it’s important enough to you, you may want it but the fear of not getting it can cripple you into inaction.  I know I’m prone to that.  Not to mention the heifer that is Negative Nancy in my head is ALWAYS sniping at me that NO ONE wants to read what I have to write.  But… but… what if someone actually does?  Just one person.  What if my story amuses someone, or makes them happy, or wistful?  It’s worth it.  

Even if I never achieve my dreams and am constantly met with rejection, I don’t want to tiptoe into the after life thinking ‘That was ok.” No! To paraphrase Mavis Leyrer, I want to stumble in, sloshing martini from my glass going “ Woohoo, what a RIDE.”  Because you only get one life, so shouldn’t you live it to the full?